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 No Party Too Far 

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

Part 12

Part 13

Part 14

Part 15

Part 16

Part 17

Epilogue

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No Party Too Far -- Part 2

No Party Too Far -- Part 2

After that crazy late night at the Grace, Antman, MikeM33607, and I all met for breakfast at 8 AM.  I lucky if I got 90 minutes sleep last night.  

We talked a little about what we wanted to do, and all agreed we were eager to run out into the city.  But first, it was time to fill up on eggs, bacon, potatoes, French toast, noodles, pineapple, papaya, and all the sweet watermelon we could eat.  Antman and MikeM33607 may have been watching their figures as they made only one or two passes through the buffet, but I, on the other hand was fueling up for non-stop fun,  and had to make an embarrassingly full four stops at the buffet.  Oh what the hell; I'm a growing boy and I need my nourishment!

A short walk from the Nana, we climbed the stairs to the Skytrain.  The Skytrain is great; it's fast, it's cheap, it's air conditioned, and is usually filled with attractive girls.  Because I don't like to mess around with coins and I expected to use the Skytrain as much as possible, I purchased one of the multiuse tickets, and so did Antman and MikeM33607.

Antman's eyes were popping out of his head at Siam Station; he just didn't know what to think about the beautiful girls everywhere.  But he did a pretty good job keeping up with us, just a step or two behind.

After the transfer and pointing out Patpong at Sala Daeng, the Skytrain eased into Saphan Taksin.  "This is it, boys.  This is where we get off."

We breezed through the turnstiles, went down the exit to the left and headed toward the river.  There was quite a bit of construction going on; it looks like they're going to extend the Skytrain across the river.  That would be cool!

Arriving at the riverbus station, we walked onto the pier to wait for a bus.  The Chao Phraya was running pretty high, and looked like it was angry.  Usually a busy river full of riverbuses, longtail boats, and barges, there wasn't much traffic on it today.

While waiting for the riverbus to come, a older farang came up and introduced himself to us.  He really didn't look like a backpacker, but it did look like he had been on the road for a while.  He was traveling through Asia on a photography tour and had just arrived in Bangkok for the first time.  It was interesting to talk with him; he exchanged some stories of his travels in exchange for information on how the riverbus worked and other small hints about the city.  I had one of the free maps that can be picked up around the city, marked it up with a few things to see, and gave it to him.  It was a little surprising to me that here was a guy traveling through Asia (for the most part on foot) and he didn't even have a map, but he had one now.  When he started talking about his money situation and his worries that his money wouldn't last for long, I started to wonder if he was going to hit me up for a few baht.  But instead he asked if I knew of any good English schools where he might be able to get a job.  He was unaware of how the forums worked, so I explained a little and suggested he might be able to get some good information there.

That's about when the riverbus pulled up.  I signaled to Antman and MikeM33607, and we all started moving towards the docking bus.

It was nice to be on the river again.  The river was rough, but the breeze was cool and it was nice to be out of the busyness of the city.

It's only a few stops from Saphan Taksin to the Grand Palace dock.  Exiting the riverbus it was pretty obvious that the river level had been much higher recently; they had collected many benches for us to walk on from the dock through the entire shop area.  I suppose the elevated walkway solved the problem of getting wet, but if you're over three feet tall you better watch your head.

From there it was only a short walk to the Grand Palace entrance.


Reminds me of my first soapie girl.


There are even a few peaceful areas in the middle
of the busy palace.

Feeling the software lust growing inside, we took a taxi to Pantip.  We got sidetracked into KFC for a quick chicken lunch.  My recollection is that we ordered three different entrees, but none of us got what we ordered.  How the hell does that happen?  At least they got the cold water part right.  It was pretty hot and humid so the fresh cold water really hit the spot.

Being the first time for Antman, he was pretty impressed with Pantip.  For me, Pantip isn't what it used to be but one can still find a few interesting things if they look.  If things keep going the same way, I wonder if Pantip will become synonymous with cheap porn.  We bought a little of that too, but then wondered if there would be any problems bringing it through Customs.  It might have been possible to put the CDs in with my CD player, but they included labels on the porn CDs so it was pretty easy to see what they were.  Oh what the hell, we didn't buy anything too weird...  Speaking of weird:  I was surprised that they had Gay porn, but no katoey porn.  What's up with that?

We were still expecting to hook up with Hammers11, Gooner, and BigHairyPig so we stopped at the Golden Bar Beer on our way back to the Nana Hotel.  A couple girls made the stay pretty enjoyable, and we ended up staying a lot longer than we had intended.

It was fun to sit at the bar and watch the world pass by.  Was that Nueng?  Am I getting stalked?  Hmmmm...  Maybe she isn't stalking me, maybe these streets is where she hangs out.  

Street vendors also passed by selling sunglasses, cigarette lighters, jewelry, and many other things.  Song, the girl keeping me company, admired a pair of sunglasses and was ecstatic when I bought them for her.  After the usual hug and sniff, Song went to work massaging my back.  Song's free massage sample was a hell of a marketing tool.  With the first squeeze of my shoulder, I knew I would barfine her to get the whole massage -- soup to nuts...

The barfine at GBB is low (300 baht, if I recall correctly), but Song wasn't shy about asking big money for ST.  I told her what I would pay for ST and said the decision was up to her.  She asked if I would give a tip if the massage was good, and when I said "Of course," jumped on my lap with a squeal.  It's a good thing I was born with three testicles because I think I just lost one there.  I wonder if my webbed feet will be useful at the soapie...

This might have been the most expensive massage in Bangkok.  Ah, but it was good.  The massage started with Song in the shower, and ended quite some time later.  Song earned the tip and a promise of more massages.  

She had to leave to take care of her kids, and I was alone left to get an entire 90 minutes sleep before meeting Antman and MikeM33607 at The Living Room.

I'd visited TLR a few times last year and liked the place.  I thought it would be a great place to start our evenings.  Our scruffy daily plan called for meeting at TRL at 7, getting a bite to eat, and then hitting the bars.  Anything more would have been too complicated.

I was hoping to meet some of the guys I'd been communicating with on the forums, but it was prolly too early in the week for most people.  Thus we three pretty much had the place to our ourselves.  But there were a few girls at TLR to keep us company, so we ordered drinks all around and a few snacks to eat.

Tune me into the wild side of life,
I'm an innocent child sharp as a knife.

From there it was back to NEP to show Antman the rest of the bars.  As would happen the rest of the trip, he didn't last long because he fell in love with the first girl that sat next to him.  There's no doubt he's having the time of his life, but I keep thinking the Big Mango has so much more to offer...

MikeM3307 and I completed the rounds on our own.  We actually got pretty good at walking into a bar that seemed dead, and cranking things up a notch or two.  So many bars were filled with guys nursing their beers while staring at the girls who just stared at themselves in the mirrors.  We found if we could actually make eye contact with the girls, we could get them to smile, and then laugh, and then the rest of the girls would notice the commotion and join in.  Of course the fact that we were pretty free with the ladydrinks prolly helped.

I had messaged with a few guys before we left, and told them they could recognize me by my black baseball cap with the yellow smiley face on the front.  What I didn't tell them is there was a switch on the inside of the cap that turned on some fiber optics which made the smiley face blink on and off.  It was mind boggling how the girls went nutz over that hat.  Girls would grab the hat, place it on their head, and proudly parade around the bar.  In some bars the girls would flat out refuse to make eye contact with the punters, but they couldn't resist the lure of the smiley face hat.

It looks like I picked poorly that night.  What can I say; sometimes it happens.  There were a few warning signs, but I chose to ignore them.  The girl was there and willing, and I was lazy; usually not a good combination.  She promised LT, but wanted to go after ST.  When she got up to go, I paid her for a ST.  Of course she wasn't happy because she wanted the LT money.  I told her "ST or LT; it's up to you -- I'm going back to sleep" as I turned my back on her and walked toward the bed.

Since the encounter was uninspired, I expected to hear the door shut behind me as she left.  Instead, I was surprised that she wanted to stay.  Okay, no problem; I can always use an extra pillow.  But this time she got to work like the LT money was riding on it, and cranked things up a notch or two.  I've got to admit I appreciated her efforts.  Still she wanted to leave when it was over.  Okay, not a problem.  A ST and a tip for the extra efforts; hell, we're in the LT neighborhood now...  And I'm also thinking if she doesn't leave, we're gonna do it all night.  If she goes now, I can get almost two hours sleep before I have to get up and meet Antman and MikeM33607 for breakfast.

Ain't this the life?

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Ommmmmm

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This page was last updated on 29 August, 2004
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