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 No Party Too Far 

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Part 5

Part 6

Part 7

Part 8

Part 9

Part 10

Part 11

Part 12

Part 13

Part 14

Part 15

Part 16

Part 17



No Party Too Far -- Part 7

No Party Too Far -- Part 7

Som wanted out of the room fast, before the maids showed up.  I told her not to worry because things like that happen all the time, she did such a good job cleaning it up, and I would give the maids a tip.  That did little to console her.  The maids were my friends anyway because I like to tip them, and I even gave the girls cleaning my room the complimentary fruit basket I received when checking in so I wasn't worried about that.

I went down and had breakfast with Antman and his GBB girl.  Burnout showed up, and joined us.

When we returned to our rooms to brush our teeth after breakfast, my room was being cleaned so we went to Antman's room to wait for a few moments.  Walking into Antman's room I was quite surprised to see giant stuffed animals bigger than the GBB girl he was spending his time with!  There must have been some freaky stuff going on in that room.

We received some emails with requests, so Antman and I wanted to take another Pantip trip. 

We had been there for quite a long time looking through binders of available titles, and Antman's GBB girl was starting to look pretty bored.  I had taken a couple nice pictures of her, so I gave Antman the SmartMedia card and told him he could go to Louis' on the 4th and have photos printed out.  Sometimes a girl's 8x10 can make a nice present.  After the photo was printed, Antman wanted to take the GBB girl to go see Harry Potter, so we parted at Pantip.  That's where I draw the line...

Taxied from Pantip to Nana - Just great!  The driver stops in front of GBB again, and in front of the very stool Song was sitting on again.  How the hell do the drivers know to do that?  Oh, what the hell...  The only thing I had planned to do is go back to CP2 for a rematch.  I'm sure I can still fit that in...  Even if I get sidetracked with Song for a while...

Song was pulling me pulling me into bar before I even got out of the taxi.  We sat for a while, and enjoyed drinks and snacks.  Song was really pulling out the stops trying to get me to take her to Phuket.  I liked Song; she gave a hell of a massage, and was biologically accommodating.  But I just didn't feel like she was the girl for me to take to Phuket.  Patong Beach is full of girls, and I'm afraid Song wouldn't have brought much to the party.  But the massages were indeed good...

Song spotted MikeM33607 walking from the Nana Hotel, and pointed him out.  We didn't really have a time set to meet up, but it was good to see he was off the clock and ready to get back to business -- monkey business!!  Telling Song I'd be back, I took off after MikeM33607.  I finally caught up with him a few doors before World Coffee.  Since we were there, we went in and checked some email.  That is, until I remembered I skipped out without checking bin!  MikeM33607 said he would join us at GBB in a little while.

Dodging the beggars and touts filling the sidewalk, I finally made it to the corner of Sukhumvit and Soi See.  All of a sudden there was a terrible screeching of tires, and I turned just in time to see a motorcyclist get creamed by a truck.  Time slowed to make the accident look as if it happened in slow-motion.  The truck hit the rider and the rider hit the ground pretty hard as his useless plastic helmet skidded across the street.  A crowd of Thais gathered around the rider, and the rider wasn't moving; it didn't look good.  I thought to run out in the street, but they didn't need another gawker hanging around.  Instead, I ran to GBB and grabbed Song.

"Song, there's been an accident.  A Thai man is hurt."

They all knew there had been an accident.  They had heard the screeching tires, and were watching as best they could from GBB.

"Song, can you call the police?  A Thai man is hurt very bad."

"No call police.  They come soon."

And sure enough, I turned around to see two of Bangkok's finest dispassionately surveying the accident.  I don't know what happened to the motorcycle driver, but I hope he was either DOA or not injured badly.  I would hate to think his life hung in the balance with the type of consideration he received from the Emergency Services.  Maybe they were just giving him an opportunity for a better life...  Mai phen rai...

As if on cue, the girls got back to the business of entertaining the punters.  I apologized for running off (Song graciously said it wasn't a problem), and ordered drinks for us and some of Song's friends.  It wasn't too long until MikeM33607 joined us.  One of his friends suggested that there may be First Class seats available on the flights the travel agent told us were sold out.  That was a fantastic idea!  We hadn't even thought to ask about First Class when we booked the tickets.  No matter the cost, I would be willing to upgrade just to ensure a few hours sleep.  

We finished our round and walked down to the travel agent's.  MikeM33607's advice was right on, and there were First Class seats available on every flight!  I shouldn't think Antman would complain much about flying First Class, so we upgraded the tickets.  I was surprised to learn the cost to upgrade was quite reasonable.  If we had known that from the start, I'm certain we would have chosen the First Class tickets to begin with.  The attractive girl got to work processing all the paperwork to upgrade the tickets, but she informed us we could not pay for the upgrade at the travel office; we must go to the ticket office at the airport before our flight to pay for the upgrade.  I felt a little bad she did all the work for nothing, so I gave her a little tip.  She was very surprised to get a tip, and thanked us with a perfect wai.

Once out the front door of the travel agent's, it's just a few steps until we're back at our table.  A few more rounds and I decide it's a good idea to barfine Song to get that massage.

Antman was missing in action.  He said he was feeling a little ill, but he was also hiding the GBB girl in is room.

I was able to get everything together just in time to meet MikeM33607 in the lobby.  I believe Burnout was going out on another crawl, but MikeM33607 and I had planned on a dinner at Cabbages and Condoms and a trip to Lumpini Stadium to catch a few Muay Thai matches.  It wasn't raining at the moment, but everything was wet.  We asked for a table inside just in case it started raining again.

Cabbages and Condoms was created to provide financial support for the Population and Community Development Association (PDA), Thailand's foremost non-governmental charitable organization.  Money spent at the restaurant contributes to Thailand's rural development, education and scholarships, HIV/AIDS education and environmental protection.

PDA operates a wide variety of programs designed to serve and assist the rural poor of Thailand.  These programs cover such diverse activities as free vasectomies, income generation programs at village level, forest replanting schemes, vegetable banks, industry relocation into rural areas, mobile health clinics, environmental education programs, and a democracy project.

For more information, visit

The dinner at Cabbages and Condoms was delicious as usual, but then again so was every Thai meal I've ever had.  (Except for that one bad larb experience...)  I don't remember if we had the Sticky Rice and Mango, but I do remember we were stuffed.

MikeM33607 and I left Cabbages and Condoms and waddled our way down to Sukhumvit to grab a taxi.  Once in the taxi, we had a short while to enjoy the decorations for the upcoming holidays; the King's birthday and Christmas.  Outside displays with pictures of the King were everywhere.  We also saw many displays containing illuminations of such Christmas favorites as Christmas trees, stars, wrapped presents, and I swear I recall seeing a snowman.

The driver took us to what I think was Lumpini Park.  I've been by there before, but I don't recall seeing it all lit up.  The park also had some illuminated holiday decorations, but I wondered if the festivities might have something to do with the recent Loy Krathong celebrations.  It looked like they had many stalls set up, and the park (at least the part we could see) was full of Thais wandering around enjoying the evening.

We were still a good walk from the boxing stadium, so we tried to get the driver to take us to the stadium.  We had trouble making ourselves understood until we said Muay Thai, then the driver understood where we wanted to go.

As the matches had already started, there were very few ticket girls out to greet us as we got out of the taxi.  Still there were enough to pounce on the taxi the moment it pulled up and help us out.  For 1,500 baht, a VIP ticket got us a ring-side seat, a bottle of water, and a souvenir Muay Thai key-ring.

I had been to Lumpini Stadium to see the Muay Thai matches a few times before, so I wasn't so worried about getting there after the matches started.  Of course the first people there get first choice of the seats, but they also have to sit through the less experienced fighters.  The fact is, any VIP seat is pretty darn good.

The Muay Thai that one can see in the bar beers of Pattaya and Phuket is okay as far as entertainment goes; it's like Big Time wrestling to me.  But the Muay Thai at Lumpini is pretty serious stuff, and a much better show IMO.

Before each round, fighters do a sort of prayer dance.  I've been told they are trying to invoke the help of their favorite gods.  The dance can go on for about 5 minutes or so, and one might see a fighter perform different movements such as flying like a bird or crouching like a tiger depending on which god they're trying to impress.

Each fighter will have a few guys in their corner to help them out; maybe a coach, trainer, second, and doctor...  Behind each fighter's corner is reserved area of about 3 by 3 meters.  I understand there a few different fight camps or schools in Bangkok, and when one of their fighters is in the ring a number of their students will come to cheer him on.  The fighter's family might also be there.

There is also a live Thai band somewhere in the stadium that plays while the fight is going on.  It really is something to watch.  As the match goes on, the music will get more and more intense.  And every time a fighter lands a blow there will be a loud cheer from all the friends and family in their corner.  MikeM33607 and I were sitting by one of the neutral corners and witnessed a bout where the fighters were trading some pretty good punches.  First the left corner would cheer, then the right, then the left again, and the right...  All that back and forth cheering could make someone dizzy.

We even saw a championship fight which was certainly a hell of a lot better that what one might see in Pattaya or Phuket.  

I think after the championship fight, the lack of sleep started to catch up with me.  I warned MikeM33607 if I didn't get some female entertainment soon, I was going to pass out.  The closest entertainment area that we knew of was Soi Cowboy, so we went out to the street to get a taxi.  There were quite a few tuk-tuk drivers and touts trying to get our business but it was pretty wet outside and I figured there was a pretty good chance it could get wetter, so we just walked up the street a little and hailed a taxi.

The taxi driver was a pretty jolly guy and spoke pretty good English for a taxi driver.  He made some jokes, and made it a pleasant drive to Soi Cowboy.  He dropped us off on the Asoke side of Soi Cowboy, and I wasn't really surprised to see Som waiting on the patio in front of the bar.  She could have been waiting there for a while but more likely since I was becoming well known at the bar, one of the girls spotted me and alerted Som I was on the soi.  No problem; I slipped Som some baht and told her I would be back after MikeM33607 and I visited a few other bars.

Suzi Wong's was one our favorite bars this trip.  Every time we went in we had fun.  If the joint wasn't jumpin' when we got there, we were pretty lucky at getting something started.  Suzy Wong's was a good example of a bar just waiting for a punter that wanted to have some fun before it would come alive.  But not tonight.  MikeM33607 and I dusted off our tried and true tricks, but nothing could raise the bar from the dead tonight.  After a round or three, we threw in the towel.

What do we do now?  Like true Pongers, we decided to start at one end of the street and work our way down.  

First stop; Baccara, the bar with the glass ceiling.  I can't really put my finger on it, but something just wasn't right in this bar.  There were a handful of girls on the stage, a bunch sitting in the seats, quite a number lining the walls, and a few dancing upstairs over the glass ceiling.  I got the feeling the MikeM33607 and I were being eyed suspiciously as we walked to the back of the bar.  Maybe it was because we were the only customers in the place, and now the girls had to work a little.  We grabbed a couple stools and had a seat at the stage.  Our order was delivered quickly and we got to work seeing if we could liven the place up a little.  A girl came over with the best bedroom eyes I ever did see and asked for a ladydrink.  I declined at first but when she showed me how much she wanted to be friends, how could I refuse?  The moment her drink was delivered, she forgot all about her new friend (me!), sat down on a stool, laid her head on the stage, and went to sleep.  What's up with that?

MikeM33607 noticed a girl on the other side of the bar that looked exactly like a Thai Jennifer Aniston.  She had the hair and everything; quite a package...

Before long, MikeM33607 and I were sharing three girls between us while Sleeping Beauty was out like a light.  Every once in a while they were dancing next to our seats, one of our girls would bump into Sleeping Beauty who would just growl at them without lifting her head from the stage.

MikeM3307 had picked up a couple sheets of little stickers and brought them out for the girls.  I was surprised how much excitement the stickers generated; girls would come over to pick out their favorite stickers and place them on their nametags or favorite parts of their bodies.  Now our little corner of the bar was rockin'!

All this excitement was just too much for Sleeping Beauty; she slowly got up and started to walk to the back of the bar.  She made it about three-quarters of the way before she started to vomit.  I'm sooo glad that didn't happen in the middle of our little party.  A couple girls ran over to help, but a surprising number just stayed in their seats and made taunting remarks.  I would have liked to know what they were saying, but I did catch a couple were saying "mao."

Our three girls had to get on stage to dance.  Once they did, another girl came over.  I'm not completely sure, but there's a pretty good chance she was a katoey.  What I do know is that the other girls hated her.  Whenever the new girl paid us any attention, the other three would all turn their backs on us in unison.  It was actually pretty funny to watch; if we were watching the girls would dance in our direction but the moment we spoke to the new "girl," the others would all turn their backs on us.

While MikeM33607 and I were laughing about that, every dancer in the bar disappeared.  Just like that!  What's up with that?  We called over a server girl who said there were police in the street.  We sat and talked about that for a while, and then decided if the dancers didn't want to be in the bar when police were around, maybe we shouldn't be there either.  Anyway, with our three girls in hiding, the bar was now dead again.  "Check bin!"

After a few bars, MikeM33607 and I parted company.  I went over, picked up Som, and we headed off to Nana Disco.  Before I could get out of the bar, I was grabbed by the girl Antman barfined a couple days ago.  She wanted to know where Antman was.  Antman said he was ill, but I also figured he was hiding with the GBB girl.  There was no way I was going to tell her Antman was with another girl, so I said he was still sick.  She wanted me to barfine her so she could go to the hotel and take care of Antman.  I suggested it would be better for her to call instead; the last thing I figured Antman could handle sick or not, was a BG confrontation at his hotel.

Like usual, Angels' was pretty packed.  I notice a guy all alone sitting at a table for four, and asked if we could join him.  His name was Fernando, and he was a young man from South America in town on business.  He said he comes to Bangkok 4 times a year, and only goes to Angels' because he has a crush on one of the waitresses.  Well, I'm sure she knew he was there, but she was playing pretty hard to get!  Fernando was a pretty good guy.  We would sing along with some of the songs, and he would dance with Som whenever the moment moved her to get up.  Fernando also had a pretty deep repertoire of jokes, and I bet they were pretty funny in his native tongue...  But we all laughed and had fun anyway.

About 20 of Bangkok's finest decided to crash Angel's, and proceeded to check the girls' IDs.  A few of the punters left when the cops came in, but we stayed and watched.  The cops were there about 20 minutes, and then quietly left.  A few moments later it was like they were never there.

We got friendly with a few girls from nearby tables, and before long had a nice little party going.  Fernando fell in love with every other girl he met, and just didn't know what to do!  As soon as he saw one he liked, he saw another he liked more.

That's when they closed the disco and kicked us out.  Because it was time to fish or cut bait, Fernando decided there was only one thing he could do -- he took two!

Ain't this the life?



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